Okay, let’s be real. We’ve all been there, sprawled on the couch, glass of rosé in hand, watching Selling Sunset and thinking one thing: How old are these gloriously glamorous, drama-filled humans? They look perpetually 29, but their net worth and life experience scream “I’ve survived a recession or two.” It’s confusing, right?

Don’t worry, I did the digital stalking—I mean, research—so you don’t have to. I dug through the archives of Instagram birthdays, old interviews, and the occasional blurred-out driver’s license. Grab another sip of coffee, and let’s break down the age math of the Oppenheim Group’s finest.

The OG’s: The Founding Femmes

Let’s start with the one who makes the agency tick, Jason Oppenheim. The man, the myth, the guy who dates half his staff. Jason was born in 1977, which makes him a solid 47 years old in 2024. I know, I know—he looks like he’s been preserved in a jar of expensive cologne and ambition.

Then there’s his twin brother, Brett Oppenheim. Yes, twins. Brett is also 47, because biology doesn’t care about sibling rivalry. Funny how they both left to start their own brokerage, yet Jason still hogs the screen. Classic twin move.

Mary Fitzgerald: The Heart (and the Botox)

Ah, Mary. She’s the one we cry with, laugh with, and sometimes scream at when she goes back to Romain. Mary was born in 1980, so she’s 44 years old. And honestly? She’s the proof that 44 is the new 25, especially if you have a great skincare routine and a wedding planner on speed dial.

Fun fact: Mary has been in real estate for over a decade, but on screen, she ages in dog years—every season, she gets somehow more serene. It’s witchcraft, but I respect it.

The Fan Favorites: Chrishell & Co.

Our girl Chrishell Stause is the emotional anchor of the show. Born in July 1981, she’s 43 years old. Wait, what? She looks like she just graduated college, but she’s been through a public divorce, a scandal, and a flip of a house that made me sweat. Honestly, 43 never looked so good.

Next up, Emma Hernan. The queen of the “Emma-ssance” (sorry, I had to). Emma was born in 1991, making her 33 years old. She’s the baby of the original crew, and it shows—she still has that “I’ll sue you, but let me eat a salad first” energy. Youth is wasted on the young, but not on Emma’s business empire.

And who could forget Heather Rae Young (now El Moussa)? Heather was born in 1987, so she’s 37 years old. She’s married to Tarek, has a million babies, and still manages to look like a Sports Illustrated cover every single day. Show off.

The Newer Blood: Amanza, Chelsea, and Bre

Amanza Smith is the wildcard. Born in 1976, she’s 48 years old. Hold on, rewind. Amanza is the oldest of the main ladies? She’s got that “cool mom who lets you crash on her couch” vibe, and honestly, she’s aged like a fine wine. Her chaotic energy is timeless.

How Old Is the Cast of 'Selling Sunset'? Here Are Their AgesHow Old Is the Cast of 'Selling Sunset'? Here Are Their Ages

Then there’s Chelsea Lazkani. She swanned in during season six with her British accent and killer suits. Chelsea was born in 1992, making her 32 years old. She’s young, but she’s got the negotiating skills of a 60-year-old shark. I’m scared of her, but in a good way.

And Bre Tiesi, the newest addition to the chaos. Bre was born in 1991, so she’s 33 years old. She’s also the mother of Nick Cannon’s child, which honestly adds about 10 years of stress to any timeline. She handles it with a straight face and a six-figure listing. Respect.

The Wildcards: Christine & Davina

I can’t forget the villains, or as I like to call them, the plot drivers. Christine Quinn was born in 1988, which makes her 36 years old. She left the show, but her presence still haunts the hallways of the Oppenheim Group. She’s like a ghost with perfect lipstick and a vendetta.

And Davina Potratz? Born in 1982, she’s 42 years old. She’s the one who stirs the pot and then acts surprised when it boils over. Her age is irrelevant—her ability to make every scene awkward is eternal.

So, there you have it. The ages of the Selling Sunset cast range from 32 to 48, but honestly, they all exist in a weird, wealthy dimension where time moves slower. Sometimes I look at them and think, “Is this what money does? Does it just freeze your face?”

Maybe it’s the lighting, maybe it’s the fillers, or maybe it’s just the fact that they’re all too busy backstabbing to notice the years passing. Either way, here’s the takeaway: age is just a number, but in the world of Selling Sunset, it’s a number that comes with a huge paycheck and a very sharp tongue.

Now, if you excuse me, I need to go slather on some SPF and consider my own age-related skincare crisis. Thanks for chatting, friend. Let’s do this again when season 17 comes out.